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Embracing the “After” life.


Okay, I’ll admit it: I’m a bit of a change junkie. My shelves are packed with books that promise to help me banish bad habits, boost my creativity, and become a rock star at parenting.

I’ve traveled to the wilds of Massachusetts for silent meditation retreats and upended my life in my mid-30s to go to grad school in Montana to learn to write fiction.

In all of these adventures, I started out as a good student, eagerly soaking up the new information that I hoped would be the very thing that (finally!) created the life change I was seeking. But then inevitably the high would wear off, and I would find myself back where I started more or less. I was just me again.

So I was smart enough to know going into Modern Elder Academy that the week wasn’t going to completely transform me like I was a character in a Marvel movie. My logical brain knew that big changes happen slowly over time. But even so, I spent a lot of time trying to figure out what I could do to make all the MEA goodness stick when I came home.

About halfway through the week in Baja, it hit me: I could choose to frame my life as “Before MEA” and “After MEA” as a way to catalyze the many mindset shifts I was learning. Yes, it’s a bit of a cheat. But if happiness guru Gretchen Rubin believes in the power of what she calls a clean slate, then I can, too.

It’s still hard for me to give up the dream that there’s a magic button out there somewhere that I could push and instantly become a better writer, meditator, wife, parent (though with the research Michael Pollan uncovers, hope springs eternal!). But as I transition back into my “After MEA” world, I see how powerful it is to frame my life as one of my own choosing.

It feels like this idea is particularly relevant for all of us now that we’re living through the truly epic change that’s been thrust upon us. While we all huddle with our families at home to wait things out, it feels like the perfect time to think about what our Before/After COVID-19 shifts might be. Could it be the catalyst that gets you to plant a vegetable garden? Could it be the catalyst for a more creative approach to making a living (by choice or necessity)? Could it be the catalyst that gets you to simplify or downsize your life?

What could your “After” life look like?

Laura Scholes is a copywriter, brand builder, podcaster, and MEA alum living in the beautiful hills of Oakland, California.

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