My cohort at MEA chose to call themselves: The Coddiewomplers. Chip shared its definition in one of his recent posts — to travel in a purposeful manner toward a vague destination. No map. No guaranteed outcome. Just forward motion and enough trust to keep going.
On the first day of our workshop, I announced, only half-joking, that I was done with the whole concept of intention. Fuck intention. I’d built a pretty good life doing what was in front of me, staying open to what arrived, occasionally looking back to notice how far I’d come. Why complicate it?
But something shifted over that week. And I think it started with a story.
A few years ago, I found myself at a writer’s workshop in North Carolina — not because I’d planned it, but because I had a week between a funeral and a reunion and needed somewhere to be. The poet leading it gave us a simple assignment: write a love letter to yourself from anyone. I didn’t know what I was going to write until I was writing it. What arrived surprised me — and released something I’d been carrying for a long time. In writing from my ex-wife’s voice, I found what I hadn’t been able to find anywhere else: that she, like so many people who hurt us, was simply doing the best she could.
I didn’t go there to heal. I went because I had a week to fill.
What separates the people who receive these gifts from those who miss them isn’t intelligence or strategy. It’s a quality of attention. A willingness to stay present inside the difficulty long enough to see what it’s offering.
What I’ve found, both in my own life and sitting across from leaders in my Vistage work, is that when you understand someone’s fuller story — not just their behavior but where it came from, what was handed to them before they ever handed it to you — something shifts. Judgment softens. Compassion becomes not a choice you force but a recognition that arrives naturally. The person who hurt you was often carrying something they never asked to carry. Sometimes for generations.
That’s this year’s lesson. Still unwrapping.
So maybe that first day I wasn’t wrong exactly. Maybe I was just arguing with the wrong definition. Intention isn’t about having a destination. It’s about the quality of attention you bring to the journey. Staying curious about what’s arriving. Noticing the gift inside the difficulty.
Coddiewompling, in other words.
The gifts were always there. We just have to stay present long enough to receive them.
-Hal
Hal Brody has spent his life in chrysalis — through music, media, real estate, and hospitality before emerging, most recently, as an executive coach and Vistage Chair in the San Francisco Bay Area. He’s been an MEA devotee long enough to know that a Coddiewompler doesn’t need a destination — just the intention to follow what’s calling.
P.S. While we’ve already had some major talent on our guest faculty roster this year from Elizabeth Gilbert to Mark Nepo, we have some big hitters coming up the rest of the year at both campuses as evidenced by this graphic.
