You know how you felt every time “what’s his name” entered the room. What’s he going to bitch and moan about today? Who’s he going to criticize? What a pain in the ass! But here comes (you supply the name). Look at that smile. And I know the rehearsal will go better now that she’s here.
Admit it, you’ve had those feelings. But wait! What happens when YOU enter the room? What are the others thinking? Does seeing you generate happy genes, positive thoughts, optimism? If not—why not?
Can’t remember if it was a recent MEA get-together on the importance of friendship, but somewhere, recently, I heard some good thoughts about Friendship, which translate to what you represent when you walk into a room, and also summoned one of my favorite fuels in life—my version of the Golden Rule. I’ll get to that in a minute.
But the Friendship thoughts that struck me as worth remembering (and putting into practice).
1. You can’t sit there and wait for Friendship to wrap its arms around you—you have to work at it.
2. Have you ever said I love you to anyone? Or vice-versa?
3. We don’t build trust by offering help—we build trust by asking for it. “Why didn’t you tell me I had disappointed you?” Think about that: Work at friendship. Say ILY now and then. Show people they can trust you.
Now, one of my favorite accelerators of life: The Golden Rule, rewritten so most people (am including myself along with four and five year olds) can understand its essential message.
You Get What You Give. Think about it. If you give a sympathetic ear when you listen (and really listen!); if your smile is meaningful and warm; if your hug is warm; if your heart is generous—guess what—you get all that back. But if all you do is moan and bitch and complain and criticize—guess what—that comes back and bites you somewhere below your belt line where you don’t see it.
Think about it: Give Good—Get Good. And when everyone knows that’s you—the person that gives Good—wait’ll you see the reactions when YOU walk into a room.
I want to close my thoughts at the end of a horrendously busy, but wildly productive day, with a poem gifted to me just the other day.
Smile
Smiling is infectious
You catch it like the flu
When someone smiled at me today
I started smiling too.
I walked around the corner
And someone saw me grin
When he smiled I realized
I had passed it on to him.
I thought about the smile
And then realized its worth
A single smile like mine
Could travel round the earth.
So if you feel a smile begin
Don’t leave it undetected
Start an epidemic
And get the world infected.
By Spike Milligan, a British comedian and poet
-Jim
Cheerfully submitted by James (Jim) Flaherty, the (if not THE) oldest male MEA graduate, who turned 90 this month, but swears he has a 10-year-plan in progress. www.jamesbflaherty.com