Being a Late Bloomer can feel incredibly defeating—until it doesn’t. In my youth, I struggled. I hadn’t found my passion or figured out what I wanted to do outside my family and friends, and I didn’t enjoy a fulfilling career.
I had several starts and misses – failures in launching successful endeavors. I looked around and saw my peers seemingly thriving which left me feeling lost in comparison. I didn’t realize then that these starts and misses were achievements of personal growth.
As fellow Late Bloomers can recognize, we often experience important life “aha” moments much later than others. I thought this was a disadvantage. It felt like everyone else had things figured out, except me. Ironically, it turned out that I had more things figured out than I realized.
A memorable moment during my time at MEA stands out. A compadre asked me what I hoped to achieve at MEA. I immediately responded without even thinking – “I want to learn how to be hugely successful and make money”—the imaginary King Arthur’s Sword I clung to from my inexperienced and unenlightened youthful self.
My compadre looked at me somberly and said, “You know, that’s not what’s important in life. What matters is love and relationships.”
At first, I dismissed him, because I do know that. But a part of me was still holding on to my envy of others’ success and the feeling that my journey was ‘less than’ theirs. And then I had a Late Bloomer ‘aha’ moment – I allowed myself to let go of that envy because, in my heart, I knew this wasn’t true.
I know job titles or financial achievements are not the only earmarks of success. And I know failures are not shortcomings but valuable learning experiences. I had spent too much time measuring myself against societal expectations of success, and now I could finally accept the beauty and value in the journey I’d been on.
As it turns out, being a Late Bloomer is a gift. It brought me true happiness and success. It gave me more time to work on deep relationships, community connections, and personal growth.
I never had a midlife crisis because I never had traditional benchmarks of success. And, with a cultivated youthful Pollyanna outlook, often an earmark of a Late Bloomer, life is an ongoing journey filled with never-ending possibilities. Even now, at 70, I’m still a Late Bloomer. I feel youthful and energized by those around me. Their energy fuels my sense of purpose.
Embracing my unconventional path is a blessing, as I know true value lies beyond what my youthful self asked of me. Reflecting on my journey fills me with gratitude for the experiences that have shaped me. I continually find myself on the brink of something new and exciting.
Despite this sense of renewal and possibilities, I understand that not everyone views aging like I do. The world doesn’t see it that way – ageism is pervasive. Being a Late Bloomer helps me to craft my life and relationships to minimize the impact of ageism. Or, perhaps because of my Late Bloomer optimism, I just don’t notice ageism directed toward me.
If you relate to my experience, hello my fellow Late Bloomer! What a club we are! As we age, we continue to redefine success on our terms, guided by our wisdom and experiences. The insight of being a Late Bloomer reinforces the beauty of our journey.
If you are searching for your passion, or reimagining your life’s next chapter, I encourage you to adopt a Late Bloomer mindset. Embrace an optimistic outlook. Welcome new timelines. Ageism be damned. Being a Late Bloomer empowers us to navigate life in ways that minimize the impact of aging. It allows the most fulfilling chapters of our lives to emerge at any age – bloom after bloom after bloom.
-Mary
Mary Mandell, M.H.Ed., 500-CYT, CLC, is a yoga, breath work, and meditation instructor, Co-Founder of Yoga for Good, which supports the non-profit community, and a Director of Common Ground CS which is dedicated to conflict resolution and creative leadership development, through art, yoga, and storytelling.
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