When you’re dealing with unimaginable challenges, cultivating resilience may seem like an impossible thing to do.
Some might say the key is to stay positive and trust that everything will be OK.
But in the face of devastating loss, this slavish adherence to optimism can not only feel inauthentic – it can cause real suffering as the positivity you aspire to remains out of reach.
A healthier approach would be to make friends with the stress you feel during difficult times. Instead of pretending you’re not feeling it, view your stress as your body’s way of preparing you to meet your challenges.
Your racing heart is preparing you for action.
Your quickened breathing is getting more oxygen to your brain.
And the hormone, oxytocin, that your body releases as a stress response makes you crave physical contact with your loved ones, so you’re more likely to seek out the support you need to overcome your challenges.
Because, as psychologist Kelly McGonigal points out in her brilliant TED Talk, the idea that stress is harmful to your health isn’t exactly true.
It’s not stress that makes you sick or even kills you.
It’s how you think about stress that matters.
When you think of stress as the enemy, it can impact your heart health and have a measurable impact on your mortality.
But when you view stress as helpful, it actually improves your health and helps your heart cells regenerate and heal – even in times of immense challenge.
So if you find yourself experiencing the telltale symptoms of stress, instead of ignoring it or beating yourself up over it, embrace it as your body’s way of equipping you to deal with your challenges.
Your heart will thank you for it.